I miss her terribly. Being on opposite ends of the country makes even a simple phone call a logistical nightmare. When I get off work, she is putting her littles into bed, and then collapsing herself. My planned trip over NYE to visit her jumped the tracks due to my bad back. We haven't been in the same place for about a year and a half. It hasn't been just the two of us in many, many years.
We realized next year is our 25th anniversary. We don't know the exact date. We met my second year of college (her first year) a week or so before spring finals when we both were taking a Theatre Design class, and she had seen me in the dorm cafeteria once and thought I might be there one morning to ask a question about the King Lear assignment we had. I usually just grabbed a pop tart and headed to class, but THAT day they had chocolate chip coffee cake, so I had actually stayed to eat. We talked for several days straight after that. We were meant to be.
We've had a few bumps along the road, but like most committed relationships, we worked/work through it.
I joke that I used up all my talent for commitment with her. She said she is okay with that.
We are complete opposites in almost every way. Really, the only commonalities we have are the way we talk and the way we use our hands to do so. We like different things, we have different attitudes and outlooks, we have different paths in life. In 25 years, that hasn't mattered.
I think of the cool stuff to do, and she figures out how to make it happen. I break stuff, she fixes it -cars, lamps, my life. We don't have to explain much any more. She is the main contributor to my massive fridge magnet collection (with a new addition from Abu Dhabi just this weekend!)
I'm going to Spain for a special hike this fall, and she can't go with me -that whole husband/two kids/other priorities thing.
We went to REI to buy my backpack for the hike. It meant so much that she was there with me, to swoon over the backpack, help me find the kind of emergency blanket that can fold up into a little bitty square, encourage me to buy the super cute travel purse I don't need at all but really wanted. She pointed out all the really cute workout clothes they have I can wear now. I rolled my eyes that they would even have my size, and she argued with me, and it turned out she was right. That's typical.
We talked almost nonstop the entire weekend. We had too many things that couldn't be communicated over a telephone or email or FB. When we fell silent, it was the being-ness of occupying the same location, when words aren't enough, or too much, or simply unnecessary.
It may turn out, when all is said and done, my greatest accomplishment on this earth is this crazy love that God gifted us, that continues to endure and grow.
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