Inside Track on Men

You would think, with all the brothers I had wandering about, that I would have an inside track on men.  I don't.

I do know a few things from observation of my brothers with their wives/significant others and my own dating experiences:

1. If a guy is into you, you don't have to wonder. He calls, texts, books the next date.  The exception to this is when you are sending off signals you aren't into him, then he gives up, respecting your boundaries and also not wanting to get completely shot down.

2.  Men are somewhat less complex than women... you feed them and act affectionately, for the most part, they are pretty content.  This ought not be mistaken for men not having feelings, they just process them differently.

3.  Men sometimes approach the first few dates like a job interview: Answer questions, look presentable, appear capable and a great addition to the team.  May not ask very many questions -it doesn't mean he isn't interested in you, it just means he is still competing.

4.  Women worry about how they look all the time, esp without clothes on ... for the most part, the guy is just happy he is in a room with a naked lady.  Worry is for naught.


That is all I know. 

Really, I am terrible at dating.  TERRIBLE.  I'm all good at the conversation part and being presentable in public part.  I'm awesome company for the first three dates.  I'm genuinely interested in getting to know anyone I am spending time with.  I'm fun.  But, if I think a guy is attractive, I dissolve into giggles when he smiles at me and have to fight the urge to punch his arm and run away.  Yes, part of me is about 12 years old. And I never know if I'm supposed to help pay or not.

I read an article yesterday about how some women put up these subtle barriers to intimacy, and so when they look at their dating history, they seem to attract horrible men.  The author's premise was that such women were actually attracting nice guys as well, but were likely missing the signals that nice guys were sending, and that since they weren't responding, the nice guys backed off, respecting their boundaries, while the horrible guys didn't respect those boundaries, and so pushed through.  I found that a fascinating theory that could bear some examination.  Later.

Right now, I'm puzzling out the guy I went to dinner with last night who graciously offered me all the olives on the salad (even though he likes them and there were only three!) just to be nice, but didn't hold my hand in the car (when he has, ahem, held my hand before.)

So, I'm wondering, maybe HE isn't the puzzlement... I am?